The Mayo Monitor October 1994 (formerly the NEWS FROM DETROIT) EDITORIAL Steve Langer Oakland University sglanger@vela.acs.oakland.edu (Ultrix) --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Standard disclaimers apply. In addition, the author makes no guarantees concerning the grammatical accuracy of his writing. Submitted text files must be in raw ASCII, compressed tar (file.tar.Z) or PK Zip format. Image files be in GIF89 (or older), PostScript or compressed (see above) versions of same. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- On last month's Fix; the answer to last month's Fix, "Baseball strikes - what to do?" is Most of you wrote that you didn't care. I found this thought amusing for two reasons a. This is the greatest survey response I've gotten this year b. Many of the respondants haven't sent anything for a long time (JJ, Raman, Tom). In any case, I agree the less done, the better. Why give these guys any indication that we miss them? It only encourages their delusions of importance. The Twins owner, in a sorry attempt to get some revenue out of his empty stadium, actually invited fans to sit in the bleachers last weekend (Oct. 15-16) to listen to radio tapes of games from the 50's and 60's. Admission was set at 1960 prices. About 10,000 showed up. These people really need a life. On Voter Cynicism: Throughout this issue, you will be bombarded by reasons that the major media gives for high voter cynicism this year. Those reasons will range from the Evil Newt Gingrich, to the decline of America's intelligence to the agenda of racist, sexist, homophobic, baby-hating radio talk-show hosts. The following list is a glimpse of what just may be a more substantial reason. [I originally ran this in Fall of 1992, but many new readers have signed on since then so the rest of you please bear with me.] Laws Congress Has Passed and Exempted Itself From (Wall Street Journal, Aug. (I think) 1991) - Social Security Act of 1933 - National Labor Relations Act of 1935 - Minimum Wage Act of 1938 - Equal Pay Act of 1963 - Civil Rights Act of 1964 - Freedom of Information Act of 1966 - Age Discrimination Act of 1967 - Occupational Safety and Health Act of 1970 - Equal Employment Opportunity Act of 1972 - Title 9 of Higher Education Act Amend. of 1972 - Rehabilitation Act of 1973 - Privacy Act of 1974 - Age Discrimination Act Amendments of 1975 - Ethics in Government Act of 1978 - Civil Rights Restoration Act of 1988 - Civil Rights Act of 1991 On gun control: Costa Verdais County in California is the latest community to institute a gun 'buy back' program. However, unlike similar programs in Detroit, New York and Haiti (where the program was named 'Gords for Guns' in honor of the local currency, see det_news94.sep) the Costa Verdais buy back is being called 'Guns for therapy' Anyone who turns in a weapon will get 3 FREE hours of therapy donated by the local mental health professionals. Think what this implies. Anyone who owns a gun is mentally unbalenced and by coming forward to surrender their weapons are 'admitting' they need help. On the Press; It's been awhile since I've done my obligatory beating of the press. Some recent sights and sounds, however, have really incited my wrath. Here's one that's so subtle, some of you may have seen it and still missed it. On Oct. 20, Peter Jennings reviewed the recent unrest in the Middle East on the nightly news. He said, "... Hamass said the recent kidnapping of an Israeli soldier was in response to the shooting deaths of over 20 Palistinians in a Mosque by an Israeli settler. Despite a rescue attempt by the Israeli army, the soldier died." Mr. Jennings, the soldier didn't die, HE WAS KILLED. Why is it that Jews can shoot and kill Palistinians, but Jews just die as if by a mysterious disease? In another eye opener, I have switched to reading the New York Times to get information beyond what is taken note of in MN (ie. cattle futures and the latest Viking score). Last Sunday's NY Times (Oct. 16) contained: a. Sec. 6 (the NY Times Magazine); Thomas E. Cronin writes that Clinton may not be perfect, but he deserves more credit than he's getting. The real problem, says Cronin, is that Americans are lousy followers. b. Sec. 4, Week in Review; Micheal Wines writes , "It's not that Wash. is not in touch. They're too in touch. With email, phones and FAXES coming from everywhere, they can't get anything accomplished." Get the message? Hey, you stupid, annoying voters, shut up! c. Book Review; As if by design, the books reviewed continue to hammer home the point that you voters out there are stupid. The Bell Curve by Richard Hernstein and Charles Murray "Mounting evidence suggests that demographic trends are exerting downword pressures on the distribution of cognitive ability of the US. If women with low [IQ] scores are reproducing more rapidly than women with high scores, the distribution of scores will decline, regardless whether the low score women were created by nature or nurture." The Decline of Intelligence in America by Seymour Itzkoff "We are not the nation we were. Relative to the rest of the industrial and developing world, we probably no longer have the intellectual capitol to profit from the available educational resources." Reviewer Malcolm Brown summarizes thus: "The lowest intellectual levels of the population are strongly outbreeding the brightest, and if intelligence is at least partly inherited, America is losing its cognitive base." Perhaps nothing so elegantly and succintly sums up the media attitude as the denoument of today's (Oct. 23) This Week With David Brinkley. In speaking of the recent rash of embarassments to the British Crown, George Will asked a very salient question. Why don't the people and Parliament just disempower the monarchy? To this, Cokie Roberts replied that they serve a very real purpose, namely, a cultural and parental figurehead. Futhermore, Cokie suggested that we could use a monarchy in the US for similar reasons. Brinkley and Sam Donaldson chimed in with enthusiastic support. Will buried his face in his hands. So you see, gentle readers, if you fail to behave intelligently and elect the right people (and I'll let you figure out who that is) you will be gently shown the error of your ways (as in Tom Foley sueing his constituents for the sin of passing term limits). If that doesn't work, the loving govt. will simply remove your rights, one at a time. Rebels will be named cult leaders and child abusers and face the devine Tanks of Mercy. Clearly, you're too stupid to be trusted to vote. You see that don't you? DON'T YOU ... click On Bill's Foreign Policy "It's the economy stupid!" Those words were Bill's reminder during the 1992 election that Bush was paying insufficient attention to domestic problems. Well, let's see; Haiti Rwanda Cuba North Korea Bosnia Iraq etc. Whatsa matter Bill? Did you forget what's important? Perhaps the presidency is more than you bargained for. In any case, let's see how you've made out. Cuba: After Fidel made his point that the U.S. immigration policy towards his nation is (and always has been) hypocritical, he voluntarily tightened up Cuba's borders. Haiti: Surprisingly pulled off without much shooting, Aristide was returned to power. A testament to Jimmy Carter's diplomacy and Clinton's military mastery? Well, maybe not. In a story buried in today's _New York Times_ (Oct. 16), it turns out that the Clinton admin. promised the dictator Raoul Cedras that all of his bank accounts would be unfrozen if he'd voluntarily leave Haiti. Not that you'll see this story in the nightly news. The Haitian people may get a bit miffed if they become aware that their opressor will be allowed to profit from his pillaging. Bosnia: Still there, the U.S. helped to shoot down a Serb plane that violated the no fly zone. Will we ever lift the weapons embargo and let matters settle themselves, or will we act as policeman for another few years? Rwanda: I guess everything there must be OK now since we don't here anymore about it. Iraq: With the U.S. threatening to send over 50,000 infantry and 650 planes, Iraqi forces pulled back 100 miles from the Kuwait border and have since dug in. The possible scenarios; a. We leave, and the Iraqi's again advance, forcing us to yo-yo our troops. b. We leave, and Saddam is so afraid of Bill's military prowess he never again challenges the Kuwaitis. c. We leave our troops there forever (like S. Korea). N. Korea: What a COUP! Just today (Oct. 21) Prez Bill signed a treaty with Kim Jong. N.Korea promises to stop bomb production, export their current plutonium supply and dismantle their enrichment reactors in exchange for U.S. and UN provided pressurized water reactors and oil. This will only cost the US and UN about $5-10 billion over the next five years. What assurance does the rest of the world have that N.Korea will follow through on their promises? Why, in FIVE years they MAY allow inspections by the International Atomic Energy Commission. Gosh, who'd like to invest their milk money with me?? Build A-Bombs, threaten world peace and get $5 billion in aid. Talk about your return on investment. Wow, and to think some of us were worried that Bill had no foreign policy experience. I think he'll probably get a Nobel peace prize with the word APPEASMENT emblazoned on it. In another move illustrative of the supreme confidence our leadership must posses, Sec. of Defense William Perry, speaking to his counterpart in China today (Oct. 18) admitted that the U.S. no longer has sufficient sea lift, air lift or smart weapons to simultaneously fight two regional wars. When Oliver North said the same thing 2 weeks ago during his senate campaign in Virginia, VEEP Algore said North was exagerating the weakening of the U.S. Armed forces, and anyway, North was a known liar. What will Algor say now that one of his own has confirmed the accusation? [Answer: nothing] Ah, what a wonderful time to be alive. The world is rapidly destabilizing, voters have forgotten history, and we're being led by folks who view the military as a money source to attempt to balance the budget. Meanwhile, they find more and more jobs for the diminished force to do. I'm tempted to say, "See, I told ya so", but I'd only get accused of plagiarism. On the economy; Why, it's booming. Just tonight (Oct. 20) that paragon of unbiased journalism McNeil/Lehrer News Hour reported that housing starts are up and the big 3 auto makers are doing the best they have in two years (of course they neglect to mention this is due to the relative weakness of the dollar against the yen). Yet strangley, Clinton's negatives are up. Clinton blames a right wing biased media for his failure to get credit for the 'robust' economy. What could those negatives be caused by? Could it have anything to do with the fact that when Reagan left office, the top tax rate was 28% and now it's 42% (Lansing State J., Oct 16)? Could it be that; a. the 1993 Census report concludes that household income fell 1.9% during an 'economic recovery' b. that despite the drop in real income, consumer spending is up, thus meaning that people are going into debt c. that the low interest rates which Clinton based his deficit reduction plan on have been raised 5 times this year d. that the 'rich' gained 1.3% in real income while the poorest quintile lost 0.2 % leading to the largest disparity between rich and poor on record e. that due to a reluctance to hire new employees, the work force is working more hours/week for less money than at any time since the 1970's ? [source: Detroit News, Oct. 16 Why in this booming economy are Democrats running away from photo-ops with the President during this campaign season? Why is Pres. Clinton spending the final weeks before the election out of the country? Why do the media think it's a good thing that he is? Why, in an effort to win elections, is the Democratic National Committee recommending to their clients that they base their campaign strategy upon refuting the policies of the 1980's rather than going head to head with their current Rep opponents? Why is Hillary always hidden before elections, to pop out on center stage immediately afterwards? Finally, why do I have this orange fuzz in my navel?? On Politically Correct housing ads; HUD (housing and urban development, a cabinet level federal departmnt) has just issued its guidelines for housing ads. Real estate agents who write ads that violate this list will not be fined - yet. Some of the forbidden words and phrases are: __ PHRASE__ __REASON__ a nice view may hurt blind peoples feelings master bedroom brings up memories of slavery nice for couple discriminates against singles wanted: bachelor discriminates against couples near jogging trail hurts feelings of the wheelchair bound near church offends atheists ideal for ... implies a bias for particular use good neighborhood offends those in crime ridden neighborhoods On an Anniversary; On Oct. 29, 1993, I successfully defended my PhD. It's been a year now since the end of that road, and forevermore, Halloween will always hold a particular sense of nostalgia. I don't know yet whether it was worth it. All I know is, neither I, nor most of my friends, are engaging in the kind of work which we sold our youth to study. For those lucky few who are, I hope I don't try your patience by trying to live the physics life vicariously through your exploits. GUEST EDITORIAL [Ed: This month, an editorial double header. The pieces have been edited [for brevity. IRS Workers Bow to Almighty Computer by Mike Royko, Lansing State Journal, Sep. 19 Schoolteacher Jim Bauser sends this in; In April I sent in my tax return as I have for the past 35 years. I expected a $750 rebate. Six weeks later I got a letter from the Great IRS computer telling me that I had made a mistake and that I was due a $1500 rebate. I called the IRS and told them I wasn't due that large a refund. They assured me that the computer stated that I was wrong and would get the $1500. On three different days I called the IRS office in Houston where I live and tried to get them to listen. I was transferred from department to department and was hung up on by a man who said, "I don't know why they sent you here." click On day 4 I got a women who was able to bring up my form on her computer screen. We went through it line by line and discovered that when my form was keyed into the computer, an amount that should have only been entered once was entered on two consecutove lines. This caused my refund to double. I pointed this out to the women but she said that I didn't understand the form and the computer was right. By now I'd wasted several hours and was getting mad. I knew I had to return the money or else they'd eventually find the mistake, charge interest, reposess my house and threaten my grandchildren's lives. [Ed: This last is an exaggeration. They'd only imprison the grandchildren. I sent the IRS a certified letter telling them how they could correct the error and told them I sent copies to my Senator and Congressman. The Houston office replied that they kicked the problem up to the Philidelphia office. Philidelphia replied that they had corrected the error and if I would send in the extra refund immediatly, there would be no penalities. Gee, thanks. So I sent in the $750 minus $20 for my long distance bill. Two weeks later they sent another bill for the $20, or else they'd charge interest on the total outstanding balance. I was going to fight them in small claims court, but my wife thought the whole thing rediculous and just sent them a check. [Ed; the inevitable outcome when the role of employer and employee [ are allowed to get confused. --------------------------------------------------------------------- A Nation of Soreheads by Garrison Keillor, NY Times, Oct 23 The voters are so angry that an editorial in the Times last week contained a story about a Savannah anesthesiologist and a retired Richmond fire-fighter who are both considering moving to Costa Rica because of how bad things are in the US these days. The anesthesiologist said that in ten years, it won't be economically feasible to live in this country anymore. The fireman said that in Costa Rica, taxes are lower, you can raise your kids as you see fit, and you can defend your property. The fireman neglected to mention that some of those high taxes are paying his pension and allowing him to retire a lot sooner than most of us. As for the anesthesiologist, I always thought they were paid rather well, but perhaps I was wrong. I do think that if these angry voters believe that the US is on the rocks and that Costa Rica will offer them the good life, then by all means go. And if the anesthesiologist wants to learn "Count backwards from 100", in Spanish, then God bless him. But shouldn't someone warn the Costa Rican govt. that they're about to get a load of Rep. boat people who have all sorts of ideas about what society owes them? How can one say this nicely? In the adult segment of your life, Angry Voter, after your parents kiss you goodbye and kick you out, life is uncertain. Even in the past, the future was uncertain, and if you can't get ahead, you're not entitled to blame the President or the Congress or your parents, even in Costa Rica. I thought everyone knew this. This is the era of the dumbing down of America, and frankly, the cynicism of people who are rowing with one oar is not of great interest. Newspapers are keenly aware that today's youth don't care whether they see a morning paper, and they try to appeal to this generation by writing down to it. To the average dim 14 year old, the adult population consists of dolts, jerks and meanies. And with reporters writing gothic conspiracy tales about Congress and the president as they have in the past year, can we be surprised if the American voter feels that his govt. is made up of jerks as well? We are becoming a nation of soreheads, and we'll probably go to the polls and shoot ourselves in the foot. Good for us I say. I say the Angry Cynical Voter should elect a congress of pinheads, nincompoops and radio talk show hosts. And in 1996, they should elect Newt Gingrich to be our angry cynical President. He and Congress can cut taxes in half, triple defense spending, build a naval base in the Okeefenokee Swamp and require all schools to teach the doctrine of original sin. [Just a bit of hysteria from a mild-mannered, centrist Minnesota son [caused by the mere thought that Dems may lose their 40+ year hammerlock [on Congress in the upcoming election. [Oh and Mr. Keillor, where was all the hand-wringing introspective [analysis of the nasty press when Dan Quayle was in office? LETTERS 1. A new friend from Mayo, Richard Tripoli, now residing in San Diego pens; The November election out here in the land of Fruits and Nuts promises to be a hot one. The incumbant Rep. Gov. Pete Wilson (Rep.) is fighting against the sister of Jerry Brown, Kathleen Brown. The Senate race is between Dianne Feinstein (Dem) and Michael Huffington. Also, Prop. 187 (a bill sponsored by Wilson to eliminate education, health and welfare benefits to illegal aliens) is on the ballot. This, like most issues, has been turned into a ethnic battle. The school boards and NEA, of course, want the benefits to continue. Personally, I don't want to pay for these things for anyone, legal or illegal. I think that if people want to pay for this stuff, they should set up a donation booth and get in line to set an example. Frankly, I think most of them are hypocrites and vote strictly on the basis of race, or they can't think for themselves, or a combination of both. Actually, I'm having a dream come true. With Clinton, along with a Democrat controlled govt., they are demonstrating their incompetance. I just hope for two things: first, that Americans learn what the Democrats really stand for, second, that the Reps get their act together. Actually I consider myself a Libertarian, but don't vote for them because I don't think they have enough clout yet to get elected and that a vote for them is wasted since it causes the Reps to lose and the Dems to win. This is similar to what I call the "Perot Effect", i.e. Clinton got elected because Bush lost a critical number of votes to Perot. Only 43% of the nation voted for Clinton. That means the majority of the public did not, yet he got elected. Maybe there should be a run-off in cases like this. Anyway, gotta go. Rich Tripoli Right Winger on the Left Coast 1642 Madison Ave. San Diego CA 92116 [A few of points. Prop. 187 has already been denounced as [unConstitutional by the Kalifornia Supreme Court since it [ "would bar children from their (state) constitutional right [to education". Even mean right-wing, baby-haters such as Bill Bennet [and Jack Kemp have come out against it. You Kalifornia citizens [should renounce your U.S. citizenship. You'll no longer [have to pay Federal or State income taxes, yet you'll still qualify [for everything except the right to vote and who really needs that? [ [Second, I did an anaylysis of the exit polls after the '92 election [and the Perot vote was about evenly split between ex Dems and Reps. [ [Finally, if you only vote for the lesser of two evils, that's all [you'll ever get. A lesser evil. Vote your heart and convince others [to follow. 2. JJ writes; From jjohnson@godiva.lanl.gov Fri Oct 21 22:54:00 1994 Status: RO Steve, WHY prevent future baseball strikes?? Like somebody actually MISSES the stupid boring sport? My 2 cents, John "will work for food" Johnson (PS - Maybe this will give people an opportunity to find a REAL sport to watch! Or at least give the baseball officials a reason to TRY to make baseball more worth watching. I'd vote for full contact, cheerleaders... hell - let lose some killer bees on the field and see how that livens things up...) -------------------------------------------------------------- John D. Johnson Home: 505 Oppenheimer #516, Los Alamos, NM 87544 505/424-7772 (H) 505/665-4054 (W) -------------------------------------------------------------- 3. And Raman chimes in from Michigan State From pfaff@ppsa.com Fri Oct 21 23:33:51 1994 Status: RO I only have one response to your survery...why would we ever want to stop another baseball strike? Luckily this one is not yet over and the best possible outcome would be the eradication of baseball from our country. The game no longer has any resemblance of entertainment in today's society. Perhaps if this was still 1900 I would have an interest but alas...this is almost the dreaded year of 2001 (where I saw no inference of the existence of baseball). Raman 4. And FLorida Doug From dwilken@ufthm.health.ufl.edu Sat Oct 22 13:13:06 1994 Status: RO Steve, We both know that we *can't* prevent strikes--if the employers and employees simply won't work things out, such is life. However, it certainly wouldn't hurt things to take away that little anti-trust exemption clause which the Major League owners enjoy. This last little bit in which the sale of the San Fran Giants to St.Petersburg/Tampa Bay was blocked was *just* a bit too blatant. If the Northern League hasn't bit the dust yet, it might be worthwhile becoming a fan of the St. Paul Saints, Steve. My esteemed brother Curtis just informed me that the Cubs picked up the Twins general manager Andy MacPhail--why the Twinks let him go is beyond me. Calvin Griffith should have had a general manager like that. BTW I appreciate that you are dedicating your column to the things that are really important: Sports issues. Hey, we all need mental enemas on occasion. (Although, I'm two years overdue for mine.) As far as the rest of the news, here is a short summary: The world is in tough shape and there are too many people who think they are the only ones who can make proper decisions for you. Doug 5. Our man in Washington writes From GRIMMJ@cna.org Mon Oct 24 09:52:37 1994 Status: RO Steve: On Baseball strikes and preventing them in the future: (1) Shrink the zone to between their balls and bellybuttons (2) Summarily execute them by forcing the players and owners to watch non-stop Barney re-runs. Other news: I'm moving to Alemeda NAS in California at the end of November. But I'll still keep this E-mail address. I have been on business travel recently, for 31 days. I've spent time in both Nevada and California. And so, from the land of fruits, nuts and flakes: I'm quoting verbatim a letter to the editor of the San Diego Union-Tribune: "WE SHOULD TRY TO AVOID DEFACING OTHER PLANETS The headline read: 'Scientists send Magellan into dive toward surface of Venus' (news article, Oct. 12). It should have read: 'Scientists find a way to pollute Venus; scientists head toward Uranus.' Could earthlings be any more insensitvie than to continue the process of basically defacing other planets. It seems that those who call themselves scientists at NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory -- I no longer will -- have little concern for their actions. It would have been a wonderful act to fire the jets of Magellan so that it could come back home for possible retrieval using the shuttle; and sit in the Smithsonian for this and future generations to be astonished at what we have responsibly and respectfully done. But as with most things with scientists these days, their concern is limited to their mission budget. We earthlings can do better than to use other planets as our dumping ground. SUMIT DONGRE, San Diego" Have fun, Steve. Mike 6. An Texas Tom adds his $0.02 From ApogeeTom@aol.com Mon Oct 24 13:29:25 1994 Status: RO > The baseball strikes. How should we prevent them in the future? 1. Bring in "scab players": undertrained, shambly minor league or, for that matter, beer league players that will play until matters are resolved. 2. Declare Major League Baseball a monopoly and fine them heavily. 3. Give all the players $500,000, plus their batting average times $3 Million. Bat .333, get $1 Million. Perhaps there should be some scaling in there, and of course, some sort of ERA deal for pitchers, and penalties for errors, men left on base, etc. 4. Start watching a real sport, like rugby. I mean, baseball's as All-American as alar-covered apple pie, Moms that kill competing cheerleaders, and rat-excrement-and-insect-laden hot dogs. At least rugby admits the players are just a pile of kids wrestling to determine pecking order. Plus the cute shorts. 5. Take all the planned player's salaries and hire the homeless to build homes for themselves. Definitely some incentive to work hard--you don't toil tough, you got no roof. In the scheme of things, baseball is so flabbergastingly unimportant, it's obvious why so many people are interested in it. Because any way you decide, it's not really that bad. It's a nice way to avoid the life-or-death decisions we face, discussing the quibbles of millionaires. Later, o physicist, Tom QUOTE(s) OF THE MONTH Einstein on pipes; "Pipe smoking contributes to a somewhat calm and objective judgment of human affairs." -- Accepting a lifetime membership in the Montreal Pipe Smokers Club, 1950 Einstein on clothes: "It would be a sad situation if the bag was better than the meat wrapped in it." --source Physics Today, Aug. 1994 FIX OF THE MONTH "Illegal Immigrants: Deport them, let them starve here, or give full citizenship and rights (whatever are left) to any who reach US soil?" NEWS Minnesota; 1. Oct. 11: Residents cheered today when it was announced that MN has risen to the 6'th highest overall tax rate in the U.S. and the 5'th highest income tax. This under the stewardship of the allegedly Rep. Govnr. Carlson. Hmmm. 2. Oct 12, Rochester: Hoologinism is running rampant! A security guard at the Crossroads Shopping Mall filed a report with the City police to whit: While monitoring a roped off construction area, the guard observed someone crossing the line into the construction zone. The guard confronted the interloper and ordered him to leave the area, but the vagabond pushed the guard to the ground and according to the police report, "Called him a bad name." The intruder then left the area. The city mayor has pointed to this incident as justification for raising taxes to hire more police. [You know Toto, I don't think we're in Detroit anymore. 3. Minneapolis, Oct 17: Concerned about possible "abuses", the Humane Society Central office has announced that it will not approve adoptions of black cats from now through Halloween. Michigan; 1. Oct. 3, Petoskey: Outside the room where the Northern Michigan Regional Militia is meeting stands a poster of a 1935 quote by Adolf Hitler extolling the virtues of gun control. Inside, Ray Southwell warns that Clinton is moving to disarm the U.S. His proof: a. the Brady Bill b. the "assault weapon" ban c. Waco d. Randy Weaver Formed last April in Emmet County, the Militia has spawned sister groups in 11 other counties with two dozen more starting up. [And naturally, it's purely a coincidence that they all read this rag. [... just kidding ... maybe. Oklahoma; 1. Moffet, Oct 21: Part of the new crime bill which was just passed by Congress was to target more money to specific locales to help them hire more cops and 'clean up the streets'. The town of Moffet was awarded $106K. There's only one problem, the one cop who patrolled all 4 blocks of the city was fired last year by the town because there was nothing for him to do. The town folk are now wondering if they should give the money to the mayor so he doesn't have to collect aluminum beer cans to amplify his Soc. Sec. checks. [And yes, this is your tax money at work. Illinois; 1. Chicago, Oct. 20: In a move which stunned no one, the Chicago Tribune formally announced its support for the reelection of Dem. Dan Rostenkowski for Congress. The fact that Dan is under indictment for House bank and Post Office improprieties apparently is a badge of honor with the Tribune, which operates under the assumption that a proven Dem. criminal is a better risk than a Rep. candidate who _may_ not be. New York; 1. New York City, Oct 25: Something very odd is happening with Reps around the country. Last week Jack Kemp came out against California's Prop. 187. This is not too unusual a stance for Kemp. What is very unusual is that Bill Bennet followed suit the next day (yes the same Bennet of Ron Reagen's War on Drugs program). Today, New York's Rep. Mayor Rudolf Gouliani (sp?) announced his support for the reelection of Dem. Gov. Mario Cuomo. [You almost get the feeling that someone is holding hostage the [loved ones of prominant Reps. Wash D.C.; 1. Oct. 13: Clinton has called on the United Nations Security Council to support a U.S. sponsored plan to create a 'secure zone' in southern Iraq. Clinton envisions a force of 650 planes and up to 50,000 infantry to prevent Sadam Hussein from once again invading Kuwait, as he is threatening to do. The French ambassador to the Security Council angrily retorted that France would not lend its aid to boost Clinton's approval ratings just before a mid-term election. [Pretty savvy, those French. 2. Oct. 22 TV Guide: Robert MacNeil of the MacNeil/Lerher News Hour has announced that he will retire next year. While he denied that his leaving the show had anything to do with a shortfall in PBS revenues, he did acknowledge that they are about to lose a major corporate sponsor and 20% of their budget by the year 1998. "I know this looks like retrenchment", said MacNeil, "but corporate money was easier to come by in the 80's." [WHAT?!? Corporate money was easier to come by in the 80's? That [was the "decade of greed and selfishness". Doesn't MacNeil know [that we have a Dem controlled govt. and a booming economy? That we're [at the dawning of a new age in kindness and generosity? I think ole [Bob is really going to a sanitarium, and this is just a cover story. 3. Oct. 21, NPR: The NIH (Natl. Institutes of Health) have announced today that otherwise healthy and asymptomatic 20 year old males have about 50% less viable sperm than did their grandfathers at that age. The going theory is that many of the compounds used in plastics and pesticides are leaching estrogen analogs that are either supressing the production, or the efficacy, of normal male hormones. In other words, males are becoming feminized. [Great. Stupid and sterile. I guess _A Boy and his Dog_ wasn't so far off. California; 1. L.A. Times, Oct 2: Hil Durkey, an atmospheric physicist with UCLA, warns that smog leads to increased cloud production and clouds with a greater surface albedo (that means they reflect more light). According to Durkey's computer models, the outcome of this is that more solar radiation will be reflected back out to space resulting in - global cooling. [Thank you, thank you. And for an encore, I'll predict what will [happen to the US economy under Bill Clinton. Whoops. I already did [that. 2. Oct. 10; Santa Cruz joined S. Dakota, Boulder, CO and other politically correct communities around the nation by cancelling the Columbus Day parade and re-naming the day 'Indiginous People's Day'. Thousands of native Americans are openly weeping by this sincere and deeply sensitive act. 3. Berkeley, Oct. 18: At UC-Berkeley, many of the liberal arts majors have had their required curricula designed by the students themselves. Classes such as Female Sexuality and Modern Lesbianism, Understanding Culture through Rap and Crystal Healing are on the schedule, but perhaps more interesting is a course in understanding the homeless culture. Taught by grad student (and former homeless person) Todd Sheldon(?), the course consists of having dinner in soup kitchens, applying for Food Stamps and other govt. assistance, and sleeping in parks. Todd refers to his class assigments as "homeless-work". Canada; 1. Ottawa, Detroit News, Sep. 17: Canada's largest tobacco dealer, RJR Reynolds, has announced its findings that smoking aids the Canadian economy by killing off people before they become old enough to become a drain on the nationalized health care system. [Let's hear it for socialized medicine ! Net News; 1. From alt.politics.us-constitution, the text of S.349, aimed at nothing less than stifling all political criticism. I know that almost none of you will take the time to read the full text (I include it only to avoid the charge that I, being a pathological liar, made it up), but in a nutshell, it says this; If you spend over 10% of your time or $2500 (in '94 dollars) to speak to a representative in Wash. D.C., or the same amounts of money or time in a grass roots effort to sway public opinion, you must register your name, those of your associates, your budget, and describe who you talked to and on what topics, or face fines up to $200,000. The new agency created to enforce this legislation will be appointed by (and only answerable to) the President. Our old friend Sandy Levin (Dem., Mich) sponsored this bill. Supporters of it will claim that its only purpose is to expose the activities of PACs to public scrutiny. This lie is betrayed by the language covering grass roots campaigns that use mass media to reach the public. You can thank the Republican filibuster for killing its passage in the Senate, course the nightly News will portray the Reps as being the enemies of campaign reform, truth, justice and the American way. Think what you will. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% From gkendall@BIX.com Mon Oct 3 12:55:23 EDT 1994 Status: RO S349 Levin (D-MI) 03/24/94 (1540 lines) Engrossed Amendment House Lobbying Disclosure Act of 1993. Special typefaces used in this bill version: // \\ Italic /! !\ Bold Italic --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- IN THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES, U. S., March 24, 1994. Resolved, That the bill from the Senate (S. 349) entitled "An Act to provide for the disclosure of lobbying activities to influence the Federal Government, and for other purposes", do pass with the following OK, FOR THOSE WITH WEAK MAILERS AND US-SNAIL, THE NEXT 50 PAGES OF LEGAL SPEAK HAVE BEEN DELETED. Ed.
Last Updated 04/14/95.© 1996 PPSA Consulting
jjohnson@ppsa.com